Autumn in the Air...

Looking out my kitchen window now, I am no longer greeted by my sweet little hummingbird visitors. 

Instead, I see the wafting leaves dancing in the wind, gently circling and swirling, a curious and hypnotic choreography of nature taking with them my memories of a summer gone by too quickly. I catch my breath momentarily, then I sigh. Autumn is beautiful and bursting with crispy, crunchy colors and the smell of smokey wood - but it's also wistful and slightly unpredictable and...augural. It makes me feel like I need to prepare for something. Is it Winter?

    No doubt it's Winter.

But Winter isn't just a favorite metaphor - it's a season in every way, and sometimes the knowledge that Winter is just around the corner can make me sad. I think I anticipate a sense of loss, a preemptive sort of goodbye that I feel in my heart and silently say in my mind; all the trees and flowers going dormant...do they have the confidence necessary to reawaken in the Spring? Is there any guarantee they'll be back and blooming?

I worry about the survival of the animals, and I hope they make it but I know some of them won't. I fight off my own torpor and try to concentrate on pumpkin scented candles and apple pie and harvest moons and autumnal decor. I love all these things - but I still worry about Winter. I still secretly hope that Winter comes quickly - dare I wish for gently - and that Winter is followed just as quickly by Spring which is actually my favorite season of all.

To help ease my mind, I find myself focusing on Spring even while Fall hasn't yet officially begun. I'm willing to cheat myself out of the present tense as a trade off for contemplating the future - a controversial exercise that goes against the much touted mindfulness, the glorified be-here-now mindset.

I mean, how can I not?

Spring.

Spring! 

How can I not fast forward my thoughts to Spring?!? 

Spring is the antipode of nervous and wistful and worried. It's fresh and full of mischief; it's the renewal of life and the hint of hope and the promise of things to come.

Spring is the Unspoiled Potential. It's the smell of coffee in the morning and the reason to wake up after a long season of slumber. It's the Dream we can continue while awake, because we already know it has all the possibility of coming true.

So excuse me if I just fast forward through these next two seasons --- I've always been a light sleeper, anyways.